Say I Am You

I devoured this book. It resonated with me so much that at times I had to pause and reread passages, wondering how on earth Nassim had captured so many of my sentiments or experiences. She has written with such ease and eloquence that the words jump off the pages. The complexities of multi-cultural lives, the choices made to honour certain traditions and rebel against others, the awareness of how much our background and families shape us, and the sense of adventure in carving one's own trajectory all felt so familiar. I am so grateful to Nassim for transporting me into Behnaz’s life and meeting the people in her life…

Susan MaybudSenior Gender Specialist in the Gender, Equality and Diversity Branch of the ILO

Assefi writes with a physician’s precision and an exile’s ache. Say I Am You is a fierce, tender reckoning with what it costs to belong to two homelands at once.

Kamin MohammadiIranian-British journalist, cultural commentator, and author of The Cypress Tree

Say I Am You takes up the question of global, hybrid identity and turns it on the aid industry itself. It beautifully captures the tragedy — and occasional comedy — of life inside Afghanistan’s humanitarian bubble, punctured by the military and shaped by donors whose agendas can sometimes be difficult to tell apart. Above all, it insists that need must be defined by those on the ground, not by foreign governments — a reckoning the humanitarian-industrial complex seems perpetually determined to defer.

Raj Patelaward-winning author, filmmaker, professor, and activist on the global political economy

Assefi takes us on a fascinating, learned, and unexpectedly relatable journey into war-torn Afghanistan. Her pro-woman, brainy protagonist — with whom we’d all jump into a foxhole — shows us the moral complexity and exuberance of a purpose-driven life.

Holly Morrisdocumentary filmmaker, journalist, and author of Adventure Divas: Searching the Globe for a New Kind of Heroine

In an Afghanistan poised between possibility and uncertainty, two women find their lives unexpectedly and irrevocably entwined. With compassion, nuance, and a keen eye for moral complexity, Say I Am You explores the demands of loyalty, the limits of idealism, and the choices that define us. A stirring reminder of the lives, hopes, and histories that endure beyond the headlines

Danielle OfriMD, PhD, editor of Bellevue Literary Review, and author of The Body Knows How to Die

Say I Am You explores violence and trauma with grace and compassion, illuminating both the discord and harmony between American and Iranian cultures.

Susan Elia MacNealNew York Times-bestselling and Edgar-nominated novelist

Thanks to Assefi's nuance and empathy, the intense courage of women blazes on each page.

Bina Shahnovelist, essayist, and journalist

A very powerful, honest and often funny account of the (West's) Afghan intervention by a writer of unusual empathy, intelligence and sensitivity.

Rory Stewartwriter, co-host of The Rest is Politics podcast, former British diplomat and politician whose acclaimed book The Places in Between recounts his 2002 walk across Afghanistan